All the single ladies want to know why they are not getting asked on dates, and The Daily Universe wants to tell them what men on campus are looking for.
Jason Ross, a junior from Newtown, Pa., majoring in environmental science, said he feels students sometimes confuse dating and courting.
For Ross, dating is a chance to have fun, develop relationships and learn to interact, which are all precursors to courting, or steady dating.
“When courting, you should be looking for someone that you want to spend the rest of your life with, that you enjoy their company, and feel like they bring out the best in you and you bring out the best in them and you work together to raise a family. That takes work, it’s a process,” Ross said. “It’s so important that it must be something that is approached with time, and thought and prayer.”
According to Mark Olgetree, a BYU religion professor, there are several things men want in women.
“I believe guys want a girl that can relax, be a little flexible, but when it comes to the gospel — to live it completely,” Ogletree said. “Most guys want a girl that is rock solid in the gospel. They certainly want someone they are attracted to. They want a girl with a good sense of humor, and someone that doesn’t take themselves too seriously. They also want a recreational companion — someone that is interested in their hobbies and activities.”
Eric Gibbs, a junior from Denver, majoring in physics, said if women want to get men to ask them on dates, women should drop hints and take interest in what the men they like enjoy doing.
Gibbs and Ross think women should remember four dating etiquette rules:
1. Show interest
“On the actual date, I feel like it is the guy’s job to make decisions,” Gibbs said. “Nobody cares where you go to eat as long as someone decides, but I feel like if girls do care about something they should say it to make it easier.”
Gibbs said often men will bring up things they like to do to see if women have similar interests, such as going skiing. Based on the women’s responses, men can find indicators of how women feel about the relationship being established and figure out if the activities suggested could be used for future date ideas.
2. Be honest
If a man asks a woman on a date, Gibbs and Ross feel the man deserves at least one chance, but if the woman is continually pursued she should be honest about her feelings.
“I don’t want to keep asking a girl on dates and become emotionally involved and not know that she does not feel the same way,” Gibbs said. “This is why I feel it is important to be honest on both sides.”
3. If the first date involves food, let the guy pay
“As a guy it almost feels like it is undermining a little bit [if you do not let the him pay],” Gibbs said. “On the first date, I feel like the guy wants to do you a favor, he wants to show some sort of interest in you as a friend or as a potential girlfriend, and to deprive him of that I feel it’s not giving him a chance to show his interest.”
4. Just have fun
“If you are having fun and the guy is interested, he will probably feel comfortable asking you out on another date,” Ross said.
