By Nedra Sorenson
Residence Life
Dear Mom and Dad,
So far BYU is just OK. Don’t get me wrong, school is great and I love my classes … but I have the most awful roommate!
Sounds like a worst-case scenario, right? Wouldn’t it be sad if you were writing this letter? Wouldn’t it be worse if you were the awful roommate?
It’s likely, if you are coming to campus as a freshman, that the only other people you’ve ever lived with have been your family. Living with a roommate – often a stranger – can be an exhilarating, but frightening, experience. Getting to know someone from another part of the country or learning about a new culture from someone who comes from a different country can be rewarding. Still, worrying about what kind of roommate you’ll get is normal.
But do you ever worry about what kind of roommate you’ll be? Being a good roommate is all about following three Cs.
You’ve got to communicate. Being open and honest with your roommate from day one lays a good foundation for the relationship. Ask questions. Find out what your roommate expects from you and in turn let them know what you expect. You may like different music or have different study habits. One of you may be a night owl, the other a morning person. Is your roommate a neat freak? What if you’re not? Learning to talk things out is great, but learning to listen is even better.
Consideration means respecting the other person’s point of view (we all have one), feelings (we all have those, too) and property. Your room or apartment is your home away from home while at school. But it’s your roommate’s home as well. It’s a place you should both feel comfortable living in.
Cooperation is the final C. Establishing house rules together and committing to them makes living together easier. Sometimes it’s helpful to write out a roommate agreement. You’re sharing a living space and that means sharing responsibilities.
Be willing to be accountable not only to your roommate, but also to yourself.
You’ve come to BYU to get an education, but not every lesson you learn will come from the classroom. Getting along with people, making life-long friends and learning to live with others is a valuable skill.
