By Alicia Barney
Standing with shackles on his hands, his arms chained to his waist, Mark Hacking stood before the court Monday and expressed his love for his late wife in a halted, staggered voice, calling her his ?heart and soul.? The hearing marked the end of the closely followed murder trial, resulting in a six-year to life sentence for Hacking.
Thelma Soares, the mother of Lori Hacking, has a tough time believing Mark Hacking?s words; she is still recovering from years steeped in lies and betrayal that ended in the death of her daughter and unborn grandchild.
Soares, a single mother of two, was thrust into the center of a whirlwind of media attention following her daughter?s disappearance in July 2004. The onslaught became more furious after Lori?s husband, Mark Hacking, admitted he had shot Lori in her sleep and abandoned her body in a trash bin. Hacking pleaded guilty to first-degree felony homicide on April 15.
Soares has appeared on ?Oprah,? ?Larry King Live,? ?Good Morning America? and several other programs to tell Lori?s story and to promote Lori?s memorial scholarship fund. She has also accepted speaking invitations on several occasions, including the Utah County Domestic Violence Workshops and the YWCA?s Week Without Violence.
Soares recently wrote the foreword for ?Shattered: Six Steps from Betrayal to Recovery,? a new book scheduled to be released in September.
Now with the trial behind her, Soares said she is looking forward, trying to find closure and struggling to grasp the tragedy of Lori?s death.
David Gehris, a close family friend, said Soares wants to move on and regain privacy and anonymity.
?I think she wants to get back to her own life, her own private life,? Gehris said. ?I can?t say back to normal because things will never be normal because Lori?s gone and Lori was such a big part of her life. As time passes, hopefully the public?s memory will fade a bit and she will be able to go to the grocery store without someone, although with good intentions, expressing their concern. It brings back up a lot of memories for her.?
Gehris has been Soares? home teacher since 1988 when Lori and Thelma first moved in across the street from Gehris and his family. He gave Lori priesthood blessings before each school year and when she was sick as well as helping Soares with household repairs and chores.
Since Lori?s murder, Gehris has acted as the family spokesperson and media coordinator for all of Soares? statements and appearances, as well as an adviser and ?shoulder to cry on,? he said.
?We wanted to make sure there was a proper purpose to every statement Thelma made,? Gehris said. ?We decided up front to keep everything positive and to follow the direction of the Holy Spirit in everything we did. We wanted to make sure something positive came out of this. I think we have done that, and we have done it by living the gospel from the very beginning. We have made our decisions by the promptings of the Spirit and we have relied on Heavenly Father to help Thelma have the strength and the words she needed and also to maintain her own integrity and dignity, not get caught up in negativity.?
An escape from negativity came in Soares? formation of the Lori Kay Soares Hacking Memorial Scholarship fund at the University of Utah. The fund has helped Soares focus on something good, Gehris said.
Gehris, who said he tried to act as a literal shield to protect Soares from the media, said the attention conflicted with Soares? personality.
?She is a private person,? he said. ?For the most part she keeps her emotions to herself. Having to talk about something so sensitive as losing a daughter to someone outside a close circle of family and friends is very difficult for her. That?s been one of the hardest things for me to watch.?
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Mrs. Soares works at the LDS Foundation on BYU campus. Many members of the BYU community have followed Lori?s story since her disappearance in 2004.
Mrs. Soares declined to speak to metropolitan newspapers and television stations since the sentencing hearing early this week, but agreed to an e-mail interview with Daily Universe reporter Alicia Barney via e-mail. The e-mail interview follows:
DU: Do you feel that Mark”s sentence is appropriate? What have the reactions of other family members been like?
SOARES: In Utah there is ?indeterminate sentencing? which means that the judge can only pronounce the minimum and maximum sentence according to state statute. The Board of Pardon and Parole will make the final decision as time goes by as to how long Mark will remain in prison. He could remain for life without parole, or he could at some time be eligible for parole. Eligibility doesn?t necessarily mean parole will be granted, however. It is my understanding that he will be there at least 20-30 years, but I suppose that could change at the discretion of the parole board.
I personally can?t think of one good reason why Mark should walk free again, and I approved of what [Third District Court Judge Denise] Lindberg said to him given the restrictions placed on her by law. [Lindberg said at the hearing that although a parole board will determine how long Hacking stays in prison, she will recommend he stays ?a very long time.?] I?m not sure there is an appropriate sentence for taking two lives. Lori?s father and brother do not want Mark to ever be granted parole. But they must speak for themselves.
I know his ultimate and most perfect judgment will come from the Lord who will judge him with perfect knowledge, perfect justice, and perfect mercy if he merits it. Until that day, I am not going to allow all this to destroy my life. Men?s justice is never perfect and often not appropriate in my opinion.
DU: Do you feel any closure after the sentencing?
SOARES: I am greatly relieved that the court proceedings are complete, and I suppose in that sense I feel some closure. It?s difficult to feel any real closure, however, because each time I pass the Point of the Mountain, I think of Mark?s future there. What a senseless waste of three lives!
DU: Does the sentencing and the end of the trial give you a heightened sense of reality? Looking back, can you remember when Lori”s death became real to you?
SOARES: It gives me a sense of finality, but there are many days when I still can?t believe it?s true. I think maybe it was intellectually easier to accept her death when they found what little remained of her in the landfill, but I don?t think I have fully accepted my tremendous loss emotionally. Perhaps I never will, even though I know it is real. What I?m trying to sort out now is what part of the past is real and what is not. I was so involved in Mark?s lies for so long that it?s difficult to know. Maybe time and speaking with Mark will help.
DU: Please try to describe your relationship with the Hacking family. How have you and your family interacted with the Hackings from before Lori”s death until this point?
SOARES: My relationship with the Hacking family is excellent. I have known them for many years, and they are wonderful, outstanding people. No family is perfect, but they are honorable parents who have tried to rear their children righteously, and with the exception of Mark, their children are all talented, accomplished young people. All the sons and one daughter have filled missions for the church. Lori?s father and brother do not share this relationship with the Hackings. Her father had never even met Mark?s family until the wedding reception. By then I had known them five years or more. Paul [Soares, Lori?s brother] had met one of Mark?s brothers once. The Hackings and I do not live in the same ward, and we all work, so I didn?t see them on a daily or even weekly basis, but I have eaten dinner in their home and they in mine. I have gone to their children?s weddings, etc., and have been invited from time to time to spend Thanksgiving with them through Mark and Lori although I have never done that.
I still speak with them frequently, and I know how devastated they are by Lori?s death at the hands of their son. They loved her and she loved them and was happy to be a part of their family. Chad, Mark?s younger brother, gave one of the most touching and beautiful tributes to Lori I have ever heard at the sentencing yesterday [Monday]. I love them all.
DU: How do you feel about Mark”s closing statements at the hearing?
SOARES: For the first time since Lori?s death, I felt some emotion from him when he spoke. He cer-tainly said all the right things, and I sincerely hope he meant them. I would like to believe him, but after having been so intimately involved in Mark?s lies for the past six or seven years, I?m not sure I can believe him just yet. I suppose time will help in that respect.
