By Casi Herbst
Amy Borkowsky is a 30-something-year-old woman in New York who has something in common with the rest of the universe - a mother. The only difference between Borkowsky and someone else is, she has been saving her mother''s pearls of wisdom for the past 10 years.
'Happy birthday to you, Happy birthday to you, Happy birthday dear Amila, Happy birthday to you. How old are you now, How old are you now, Better hurry and find a husband, Before your ovaries shut down. All right, that''s just a little creativity for my birthday girl. I love you sweetie,' Borkowsky''s mom said on just one of her many messages.
These messages (like the one above) include everything from reminding Borkowsky to empty her bladder before going to the DMV because the lines are long, to informing Borkowsky of thieves who mark their victims with bottles of ketchup.
Borkowsky was working as a vice president of an advertising firm when she decided it was time to try her hand, and whit, at stand up comedy. Although the first few runs were hit and miss, she decided she would start relaying her mom''s messages on stage.
She found even when she had a bad night; her mom''s messages were a hit. Borkowsky then decided to publish her mother''s messages on c.d., and that lead to the book entitled Amy''s Answering Machine- Messages From Mom.
The book was held at No. 1 on amazon.com on Mother''s Day 2002.
Older children like to buy the book because 'they can share the pain and know they aren''t alone,' said Borkowsky. Moms like to buy the book for their children so they can say, 'compared to Amy''s mom I''m not that bad.'
Overall, Borkowsky said her mother''s messages are popular because, 'Mother''s worrying is universal.'
Borkowsky''s mother has been very gracious about having her messages published. However, after the first release of the c.d. Borkowsky got many messages with only the sound of someone hanging up.
'That lasted about three hours,' said Borkowsky. Then her mother began to leave messages again. This time they were very professional, like a message machine 'diva.' That faded also, and now the messages are back to normal.
Why did she start saving all these messages in the first place? Borkowsky said every year her New Year''s resolution is to write in her diary, and every year she is 100 percent faithful until January 7th , when the tradition stops.
Saving her answering machine messages was an easy way to keep a journal with no upkeep on her own. In fact, Borkowsky saves all her messages. She has enough messages to make Volume 409 of Amy''s Answering Machine if she wants.
There will be a Vol. 2 coming soon, however no definite dates have been set.