By Jennifer Guertin
For those sick of sugary Valentine phrases and candies, Kristin Murdock, owner of Cow-Pie Clocks and Cards, offers a more pungent alternative: cow dung.
Murdock''s customers celebrate Valentine''s Day with quartz clocks set in genuine, dried, Southern Utah cow pies. Each clock has a tag saying where and when the pie was dropped and a customized saying such as 'Now you''ve stepped in it' or 'Be my Valenturd.'
According to Murdock, the most popular saying is, 'For all you do, this crap''s for you.'
Cow-Pie Clocks recently came out with cow pie cookies and scratch n'' sniff cow pie cards, which Murdock said are more popular near Valentine''s Day.
'It is kind of sick,' Murdock said. 'But it''s so fun.'
Cow-Pie Clocks began by accident three and a half years ago when Murdock started picking up cow pies at Lake Powell.
'They were completely dry,' she said. 'And they were really interesting. You can look at the bottom and see what the cow ate.'
Murdock said she gathered about 12 pies, which she brought home to Provo and propped up along the wall of her garage.
Murdock''s 17-year old son, Kasey, said he thought his mom was crazy when she brought the cow pies home.
Even Murdock said she wasn''t sure why she kept them, but had a feeling she shouldn''t throw them out.
After a few months, Murdock found she could seal the cow pies and keep them from crumbling by dipping them in shellac used to varnish wooden boats.
'It cost about $1,000 to find a glaze that didn''t soak right into the cow pie,' she said.
After a neighbor helped Murdock drill holes into the pies, she fit them with quartz clocks and sent them out to her friends on butcher platters as gag gifts. She gave one clock to her sister''s mother-in-law who was visiting from New York.
'She about died,' Murdock said. 'She loved it.'
While in town, the mother-in-law showed the gift to her friend, entertainer Donny Osmond who immediately called Murdock and requested a clock.
A few weeks later, Murdock turned on the 'Donny & Marie' show to see Osmond displaying a clock and embellishing the story to roars of audience laughter.
'The segment was only a few minutes, and it was all lies,' Murdock said. 'But it started the business.'
The next day, she got a call from someone at the 'Donny & Marie' show who said he needed to know where to send viewers wanting to buy cow pie clocks.
'I panicked,' Murdock said. Up to that point, she said, the clocks had been a joke.
'It took me about a day and a half to get my business license and phone line - to literally be in business,' she said. 'To put the Web site and everything together took a couple of weeks.'
Cow-Pie Clocks is now an international business, but it still draws some odd looks.
'She has a retaining wall out back she hangs all the cow pies on,' said Aaron Johnson, a UVSC graduate hired to care for Murdock''s lawn. 'I thought it was pretty bizarre. For a few weeks I wondered what kind of people I was working for. I did buy one off her, though.'
Murdock said most friends who called her crazy called later to order a clock.
It isn''t just the clocks; it''s Murdock''s enthusiasm, said Murdock''s sister Candice Gasdik.
'She includes everyone,' Gasdik said. 'We all go down to St. George in the cow pie truck and comb the hills. Kristin squeals with delight when she finds one. Everyone has a great time.'
For information on the clocks and purchasing, see www.cowpieclocks.com.