Ask Andie: Is this friendship worth saving?


A brand-new addition to The Universe.

You tweet at us. You send us Instagram photos. You share your opinions in the Reader’s Forum. Now we want to respond. We know school is tough and everyone struggles at some point. We know you don’t always know who to talk to. That’s where Andie comes in.

In the universe, Andromeda is the Milky Way’s neighboring galaxy.

At The Universe, Andromeda, better known as “Andie,” is the girl next door, the one you can turn to for help with any issue you might be dealing with.

Roommate drama? Ask Andie. Problem with school? Ask Andie. This isn’t another dating column, but she can help with relationships, too.

Send us your letters! Let Andie help!

To get us started, here’s our first question:

A guy friend and I got into an argument, and he stopped talking to me for three months. Like, he said he was purposefully ignoring me. Then a few weeks ago he told me he wants to work on our friendship. My friends think I shouldn’t bother and he doesn’t deserve my friendship, but I’ve been his friend for a long time. I don’t know what I should do. Can you help?
Ignored and Confused

I know a little bit about friendship, and it doesn’t sound like you guys have one. Friends do fight, but they don’t go three months in an angry silence and expect to just pick up where they left off. I can’t think of any healthy relationship in which that’s acceptable.

You shouldn’t have to work on a friendship like it’s a business contract. If he really wanted to stay friends, he would have said something to you two months and 29 days earlier. In my opinion, life is much too short to worry about people who make you unhappy. It’s also too short to cut people off without giving them at least a chance.

I think you should tell him how you feel. Tell him that you feel ignored and try to figure out whether or not he cares about you. Maybe he didn’t talk to you for so long because he thought you didn’t want to hear from him. Maybe he didn’t know how to maturely deal with his emotions. In any case, be careful.

You don’t need to have a DTR, but you do have to figure out whether he’s worth your time. If someone purposely ignored me for that long, I would consider the friendship to be over, but you can still give the guy a chance. After you talk to him, if you do choose to walk away, you can hold your head high knowing that you tried your best.

Readers, what do you think? Is this friendship salvageable? Have you ever had a similar experience? Post your opinion or advice in the comments, or tweet @askandie7. We’d love to hear from you!

Have questions about school, work, friends, love or impending life-altering decisions? Andie’s here for you. Tweet your questions @askandie7 or email .

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