Letter to the Editor: No excuse for not dating at BYU


    Dear Editor:

    Have you ever had an interview where your social life became the topic of interrogation? Do you wonder what general auxiliary in the church is responsible for “mix and mingle?” Do you feel pressure from all directions to get married? There is a definite problem at BYU in the way the topics of dating and marriage are addressed.

    We understand and agree with the statement in the “Proclamation on the Family” that “marriage between a man and a woman is ordained of God and that the family is central to the Creator’s plan for the eternal destiny of His children.” However, the problem lies in how that doctrine is applied to students. It is safe to say every individual worthy of a continuing ecclesiastical endorsement has heard the doctrine correlating eternal marriage with eternal life. There is no harm in the repetition of doctrine, but when well-meaning Bishops and other church leaders make it their personal mission to find you a mate, you lose the desire to date. No program or incentive from church leadership is going to improve your chances of getting married or dating.

    When have you ever been around 30,000 people your age, with whom you share common beliefs and ambitions? Just the fact that you are here increases your chances of dating and getting married. Face it, how common is love at first sight? Ladies, if you want guys to ask you out, talk to them. Don’t overanalyze; be friendly and take responsibility for finding and forming the relationship you want. Guys, talk to the ladies. Take time to get to know them before you decide there is no one to date. Get over your fears and your laziness. There are too many people who walk around this campus without even trying to interact with others. Then they complain that they never date. This can and will be the best time of our lives to find eternal companions. We need to move the responsibility for dating and marriage from our church leaders to ourselves.

    Craig Weber

    Parma, Idaho

    Tara Nelson

    Las Vegas

    Andrew Baird

    Vacaville, Calif.

    Paul McAllister

    Millington, N.J.

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